Apr 30, 2025

10 surprising reasons why children answer their parents back

TOI Lifestyle Desk

Why do kids answer back?

Reasons behind why your kids answer you back might shock you!Let us look at some of the most common reasons why children answer their parents.

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They are testing boundaries

Often, you might notice your children pushing your limits to understand their position in your life. Talking back is one of the ways to see how much control they can assert and where the lines are drawn.

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They want their opinions to be heard

At first, it might seem disrespectful or unnecessary. Children like their opinions to be heard, and they sometimes feel their feelings are being ignored. Their answering you back is a way of saying, “listen to me too!” And it is not always disobedience.

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They are imitating you

Kids learn to adapt and absorb quickly, especially certain behaviours from their parents, teachers, and elders. If they hear sarcasm or assertiveness at home, they might try to mirror it outside without realising that this might be disrespectful to people.

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They want to be independent

As children grow, over time, especially teenagers, they seek independence. Talking back is one of the most common ways of showing growing confidence, even if it comes off as rude or disobedient at first.

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They are feeling powerless

If your child’s opinions and feelings go unheard, they lash out. Answering back is a quick and effective way for them to feel powerful. It gives them a sense of agency when they feel hopeless and small.

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They are emotionally engulfed

Stress, anxiety, and the drive to be the best can trigger certain behaviors. Talking back is a way to release pressure when a child feels too overwhelmed.

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They do not understand tone yet

Younger children often cannot differentiate between being assertive and being rude. They might answer you back simply because they are mimicking your tone without understanding social nuances.

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They are being treated unfairly

Even if a child suspects injustice, real or imagined, they may respond with sharp words. Answering back becomes a protest against what feels like biased treatment.

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They are struggling to regulate their emotions

For teens, especially, regulating emotions is a whole new task. When they are angry or frustrated, children may lash out with words because they do not yet know how not to react in certain situations.

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They are seeking a connection with you.

Negative attention is still some kind of attention. If they feel neglected or ignored, they may just provoke you to feel their involvement.

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Thanks For Reading!

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